Two Year Review

My husband and I had our 2 year anniversary a couple weeks ago! It is truly hard to believe that so much time has passed. It seems like just yesterday I was driving cross-country to Oklahoma to live with my boyfriend. I was 22 years old then.

Now I am 26 (and a half). I feel like a completely different person from that scared little girl in the car. So much has happened since then. Most of it in our second year of marriage! For the first time in my life, I feel like an adult. I am an Aunt. I have held 3 newborn babies. I have changed a diaper. We have bought a car. I have had serious thoughts about living in a house. I have had serious thoughts of being pregnant and starting a family. While these events aren't specific to all women in their mid-20s, they are specific and significant to me. According to me, I am an adult now. At last.

What I mean by that is I did not enjoy my teens or early 20s. At a time when most kids are figuring themselves out, going to parties, shrugging off mistakes, I was lost. I never really knew how to be that age, as odd as that sounds. I was awkward, couldn't figure out how to make new friends, had a rare form of OCD, and had absolutely no fashion sense. ("Mom, why can't I have these super baggy black pants with studs and giant pockets that drag on the floor?" "Hey look, this shirt is reversible!" ) I wanted to fit in, more than anything in the whole world, had absolutely no idea how to do that, and stuck out like a sore thumb (or just blended into the background? I was never too sure which). I always felt like I was living in the wrong decade. That instead of turning 13, I should have just jumped to 26. Because that was my magic number. I knew what I would want at that age. I would want a husband. I would want to be a soccer mom. I would want to have other friends that were moms. I would want to join the PTA. Why couldn't I just be 26 now?

The answer? Because I had to go through everything I went through to get here. I get it now. I finally understand. If any one thing in high school went differently, I wouldn't be where I am. That cliche is completely accurate. Wishing things went differently is pointless. For one thing, I love the friends and memories that I have from that time. I met my husband through one of these friends and I am eternally greatful. It can be fun to look back. But it is way more important to look forward.

I did not have these thoughts at our one year anniversary. There was still more that I needed to learn at that time. There is more that I need to learn still. But I do know one thing: If I am still in the area for my RHS Class of 2005 reunion, I will walk into that place with my eyes looking forward and a big smile on my face.

Bring it on, Marriage: Year 3




Years 0, 1, 2