The words and wisdom of Mitch Albom

Mitch Albom has written some of the most thought-provoking books that I have ever read (and probably will ever read.) He shared his treasured moments with an old and valued friend and mentor in Tuesdays With Morrie. He discussed about the importance of each individual person and how their afterlife is affected in The Five People You Meet In Heaven. He wrote about getting to spend more time with a lost loved one in For One More Day. And then he shared his thoughts on the importance of time and how it all began in The Time Keeper. In this blog post I will talk about each of them, including what I learned from them, quotes that I liked, and which ones were my favorite. If anything comes from writing this blog post, I hope that I can convince at least one of you to read at least one of these books. I promise you won't be disappointed!

The Five People You Meet In Heaven
Probably my favorite book out of the four. Yes, even before Tuesdays With Morrie. If you haven't been introduced to a Mitch album book as of now, I would urge you to read this one first. The concept is simple: “There are five people you meet in heaven. Each of us was in your life for a reason. You may not have known the reason at the time, and that is what heaven is for. For understanding your life on earth. This is the greatest gift God can give you: to understand what happened in your life. To have it explained. It is the peace you have been searching for.” Kind of like having 5 ghosts of Christmas Past. It is incredible to think of how many people you may have influenced without realizing it. In case you need more convincing, here are a couple more awesome quotes:

“Death doesn't just take someone, it misses someone else, and in the small distance between being taken and being missed, lives are changed.” 

“Sometimes when you sacrifice something precious, you're not really losing it. You're just passing it on to someone else.” 

“The only time we waste is the time we spend thinking we are alone.” 

Seriously. Read this book.

Tuesdays With Morrie
This was the first book I ever read...not sure when, probably back in high school. This book is nonfiction, about a relationship between the author and his dying mentor, Morrie. They meet every Tuesday and Morrie talks to Mitch about everything he has learned in his life, advice for him for the future, how it feels to be dying, everything a person would want to hear from a mentor. I wish I had a relationship with one of my teachers the way Mitch had with Morrie. If you read this, so will you.

"So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they are chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others,  devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning."

"Sometimes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. And if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too-even when you're in the dark. Even when you're falling."

Read this one, too.

For One More Day
This book is short. If you're looking for a book to read in a day or less, this is your winner. This book shares an idea that everyone hopes will happen to them. That when life gets you down to the point where you don't want to be a part of it anymore, someone that you have loved and lost will come back to you and remind you of what you have to live for. I found this to be harder to believe than The Five People You Meet In Heaven for some reason, even though both have to do with being visited by people from the dead. It still has some good morals.

“One day spent with someone you love can change everything.” 

“When you're rotten about yourself, you become rotten to everyone else, even those
you love.”

"...You can go your whole life collecting days, and none will outweigh the one you wish you had back.”

The Time Keeper
This is his most recent book, it came out last year. I was so excited to read a new book by Mitch Albom...but it's my least favorite. It has to do with the man who invented time and he gets punished and then has to help these two people: One who wants to extend his life as long as possible and another who wants to end her too early. I can tell you the moral right now: Appreciate life for what it is and what your life may have to offer the world. Blah blah blah. I will provide you with quotes, in case you're interested in the book, anyway. I'm sure plenty of people disagree with my opinion.

“As mankind grew obsessed with its hours, the sorrow of lost time became a permanent hole in the human heart. People fretted over missed chances, over inefficient days; they worried constantly about how long they would live, because counting life’s moments had led, inevitably, to counting them down. Soon, in every nation and in every language, time became the most precious commodity.” 

“The length of your days does not belong to you.” 

“It is never too late or too soon, the old man had said. It is when it is supposed to be.” 



Moral of this blog post: Explore Mitch Albom. You won't be disappointed!

One Year Review

Today is my one year anniversary. One year ago today, I stood across from Dan on a slightly chilly Sunday afternoon and exchanged rings, vowing to spend the rest of my life helping to fill our lives with happiness, humor, and challenges. The wedding itself was, to this day, the best day of my life. All of my closest friends and family were there and the dance floor was never empty. I felt loved and beautiful and full of hope and excitement for our future.

So I thought that I would reflect on our first year of marriage here. I’m the type of person who loves looking back at my life, remembering how I felt about certain memories and situations, so I think that in 30 years, when I want to look back at how the first year was, I will have this entry to remember. (Also, I will probably print this out and save it. I hoard this kind of stuff. I have a huge envelope filled with nostalgia.)

Less than a month after the wedding, my loving husband went on our honeymoon without me. He was sent on a mission to HAWAII for a week, leaving me to freeze my tuchas off in New Jersey. In November, we had a lovely Thanksgiving with my extended family in New York and I participated in Black Friday for the first time. In December, we celebrated Hanukkah with my family and then celebrated Christmas with Dan’s family and friends. We had a quiet New Years Eve, preferring to watch the ball drop together. A couple days later, Dan deployed for the second time. This deployment was worse than the first, for me. The first time was the previous summer and I had just started a new job and was busy busy busy planning the wedding. I went to my parents house a lot and the days just flew by. This time was different. It was cold. There wasn’t a wedding to look forward to. And I hated my job. I was sad and lonely and ate my feelings. Dan and I decided it would be better for me (and us) if I quit that job. I quit my job the Friday before Dan came home and I felt two gigantic weights lifted from my shoulders. In case any of you are wondering, I have still not regretted quitting that job. (The girl they hired to replace me quit less than a month after I left.  Not surprised.) Less than a month later, he came home announcing that he was going to Spain for a month! I was happy for him and we talked about me going over to visit. By the time I got my expedited passport back, he had gotten a better handle the goings on over there and didn’t think he’d be able to spend any time with me at all. And I don’t speak any Spanish, so I didn’t want to be wandering around a foreign country alone. So I passed on the trip. Dan deployed again on July 4, meaning I was going to miss celebrating his birthday for 4 years in a row. This was also a tough deployment (though not as bad as the second time) as I wasn’t working and was bored out of my mind. But I made it through. Soon after he got back, I decided to take the GREs, so I signed up for a Kaplan Prep Class. I was also offered a temporary position at Campbell (which I’m hoping turns into them hiring me) which I am now working at and, thankfully, enjoying.

Dan has also been on other trips and I have done other things, but these are the key events that I know I would want to look back on and smile about in the future. If anybody has read through this, thank you for your interest!

The Pumpkins of Fall

This weekend is shaping up to be a fantastic first weekend of Fall. The sun has been shining, the weather has been in the cool 70s, and I had my first (and second) pumpkin iced coffees of my life. (They are amazing and I have been missing out!) I never realized that Autumn was my favorite season until I got married during it, but it really always has been. Thick scarves, high boots, pumpkin flavored everything, apple cider donuts, browns, reds, golds...it always makes me appreciate the fact that we have seasons. And Fall is a rather fantastic one, don't you agree?

What makes this weekend even more awesome is how we spent it. We had friends over and Dan spent the afternoon brewing beer with his friend while I enjoyed the company of his wife and adorable baby girl. While they were here, we received a call from a very close friend of ours that he had gotten himself engaged! We could not be more excited for him and his new fiancee and the story of how they got engaged is just magical. And tonight we have the Patriots game and the Emmy Awards! Fun for both of us.

Meanwhile ...

Both times my sister and I have visited our grandmother in Virginia, I end up taking books home and Secret Daughter by Shilpi Somaya Gowda was one of them. It was a story about adoption, different cultures, and the importance of knowing where you come from. I find India and all of its cultures and traditions fascinating and beautiful and if you do as well, you will enjoy reading this book. It is told from a few different perspectives, which is a technique that I like. I find stories more enriching when I can understand it from different views.

While I was reading this, I was also finishing up the audiobook I had in my car. It took me over a month to get through it, as it was a 24 hour story. But it was so worth it. As I had mentioned in a previous post somewhere, I had tried to read Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides before and could barely get through the first chapter. I knew it was a book about a hermaphrodite and I have always found genetic anomalies fascinating, so I was interested to read it. I stopped reading it for two reasons: 1.) I didn't understand why the main character's brother was referred to as "Chapter Eleven" and 2.) It really wasn't about the genetic anomaly at all. But having the story read to me in all the different voices and accents really brought it to life. It turns out, it isn't about hermaphroditism so much as it is a detective story about how that particular chromosomal difference occurred. The reader is taken on a journey that goes as far back as the main character's grandparents and the long journey from their story, to the parent's story, and then to his story. Think "How I Met Your Mother"-esque (this happened because that happened because the other things happened). I am very glad I gave this book a second chance because it was AWESOME and I highly recommend it. In audiobook form, if possible. (Also, after doing a little research, the name bestowed upon his brother by the main character has something to do with the the U.S tax law Chapter 11. Interesting.)

The last book I finished has a little story behind it. When Dan was deployed, I started watching the TV show "Bones" on Netflix. And fell in love. Not since E.R. have I found an hour-long drama show that I felt so connected to. It turns out that the show is based off a series of novels that were written about a forensic anthropologist that helps solves murders using bones (like the show). I was so excited that I couldn't wait for the first book in the series to check back into the library, so I downloaded it onto my Kindle. And I was disappointed. Aside from the name and occupation of the main character, nothing else was the same. Her personality and lifestyle were different, her location was different, and none of the other characters in the book matched the characters from the show. And that bummed me out. Once I realized it wouldn't be the same, I tried to separate the show and the book in my mind so that I could try to enjoy Deja Dead by Kathy Reichs on its own. In the end, it was a good mystery, but not what I was expecting (and not in a good way). So really, I would only recommend this series if you haven't seen the show. But I DEFINITELY recommend the show. Seriously. Start watching.

My next blog post is going to have a theme! Gasp! Woo! Seriously, it'll be fun. Have a great weekend! Happy reading.

My Summer Reading List

It is quite hard to believe that the summer is almost over. It seems like just yesterday I was worrying how I was going to make it through these two months with Dan being deployed. I dreaded summer this year, which makes the first time I’ve ever felt that way in my whole life. Starting when I was four years old and ending at 17, summer was when I learned how to be independent and to explore myself and the world around me. Day camps and Sleep-away camps defined my summers from before I lost my first tooth until after I learned to drive. When the time came that I needed to start working during the summer it was like learning how to breathe differently. For so long, just the feel of sun against my skin was synonymous with lying by the pool and protesting against playing sports (I am not athletic, in case you were wondering). And even now, eight years after my last camp summer, I still close my eyes as the sun hits my face and allow myself be transported back to my summers of blissful freedom.

Me, during my last summer at camp.

I may have digressed slightly from the original point of this post, which was to talk about the books I have read over the summer so far. But my brain had made the connection from summer reading to those summer reading lists we were all forced to pick from over the summer. Which reminded me of how much I put it off while I was at camp in favor of hanging out with my friends. Which led to my camp reverie. But now I am back to reality. Summer reading!

Then Came You by Jennifer Weiner

Jennifer Weiner is one of my regulars. What I mean by that is when I find an author I like, I go on a reading rampage of all of his/her books until I have to wait for new ones to be written. She is one of those authors. I enjoy her books a lot, I consider them great summer reads. She is the author who wrote In Her Shoes, which came out as a movie with Cameron Diaz back in 2005. That book was fabulous and I believe it was the first book of hers I had read, although I’m not sure what drove me to read it in the first place. It could have been the cover. I am very drawn to books with fantastic covers and I am not ashamed to admit it! That technique has led me to many great reads. Anyway about this book…I definitely thought it was a great read. It circles around the stories of 4 women and how their lives eventually all connect. To be honest, it was very easy to see how their lives would come together once I read a little from all of their different points of view. But knowing how it’ll all end up doesn’t mean it isn’t enjoyable going on the journey with them. A good beach read, in my opinion. And there are still a few weekends left of some good quality beach time to be had.

Home Front by Kristen Hannah

Another one of my regulars, she was also a victim of me loving the covers of her books. I don’t remember which of her books was my first, but her covers always look so inviting. Not sure what it is. I actually read this book as an audio book. I like choosing audio books that I know I will like because it will make my long drives that much more enjoyable. So when I saw she had a new book out and it was available in audio form, I grabbed it! It actually revolved around military life and how a family has to readjust when a parent goes to war. In this case, the mother went to war, which meant a complete family adjustment, as she ran the roost. I liked hearing about how her husband had to change everything about his life and himself as he struggled to repair a family neither of them noticed was broken. A good read and I recommend it!

The Pilot’s Wife by Anita Shreve

I actually started reading this book many years ago but I found it so boring that I stopped reading it. When I saw that it was on Oprah’s book list, I knew I would be giving it another chance. I was hoping that when I read it a second time (now being older and wiser and an actual pilot’s wife!) I would change my mind. I didn’t. I found it so dull and uninteresting. I believe that it was written in a very dull and muted way on purpose (although I’m sure the author wouldn’t have used the word “dull”) as a way for the reader to feel the grief that the widow felt after losing her husband. The reader goes through the motions, just like Kathryn, and has to feel what she feels. I guess personally I didn’t like that approach. Even when the story gets to the most interesting part, it is still told in a numb and muted way, when I thought there should have been way more build up and some fire and ice. But that’s my opinion. I probably won’t read any more books by her. Which I realize might not be a fair thing to say and I shouldn’t judge the author just because I disliked one of her many books, but there are thousands of other authors out there and I would rather try some of theirs. (Which sounds slightly hypocritical, since the other two books I read this summer are not from any of these thousands of other authors. But still. I’m not going to read what I’m not interested in.)

I am currently in the middle of a book by a new author, actually (Secret Daughter by Shilpi Somaya Gowda). And I am also reading a book on audio, which I had also tried reading in the past and didn’t like. I must say that I am LOVING it now (Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides). More to come when I finish it. And I also discovered a whole line of books by a new author that coexists with one of my favorite new tv shows (Kathy Reichs' Temperance Brennan series, which is where the tv show 'Bones' comes from). More to come on that when the first book in the series returns to the library!

Have a great summer day and don’t forget to take a minute and enjoy the sun. 

Sex, Happiness, Gymnastics

Sex

I'm sure you can all guess what trilogy I am referring to! I actually finished the Fifty Shades trilogy way back in May, but I really wasn't looking forward to talking about my opinions. I still have mixed feelings about them. On the whole, I really enjoyed the plot and the characters. Downloading the first book onto my Kindle, all I knew about the series was the term "Mommy porn" and that there would be S&M. When I finished the first book, I was thoroughly surprised about how much I enjoyed reading it and how much I was looking forward to downloading the next one, which I did the second after I finished the first one. The characters were mysterious, the plot was exciting and intriguing, and the "intimate" sections weren't as scary as I was lead to believe. The second book was my favorite, but by the time I reached the third, I was getting more and more annoyed with how bad the writing actually was. The repetitiveness of various phrases, the frequent use of ridiculously placed SAT words (how many times can an author use the word "mercurial?") and the sixth grade reading level (peppered with the SAT words) were making it hard to focus on the story. Now, I don't claim to have any sort of qualifications when it comes to critiquing a person's writing style and I know the way I write probably won't get me into any literary magazines (I do love run-on sentences and flipping tenses). But I love to read and have been reading for a long time and I have never read an adult book that was written in the same style as the Baby Sitters Club series. I can honestly say that I hope the movies are better than the books, because the story itself is interesting!

Happiness

I have been reading The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin for a while, actually. It was an impulse buy at Target because I was drawn to the cover of the book. My name is Samantha and I do judge books by their cover. I have been reading the book quite slowly because I am thoroughly enjoying it and I want to take in all the advice that I can. I have been working on trying to elevate my level of happiness for many years and this book seems to be what I've been looking for. I am amazed at how much reading and research this woman did just to be able to put all the happiness knowledge available into an accessible book. I am practically hanging on every word this woman is saying and quoting and I am going to re-read and highlight the book so that I can really talk about the profound conclusions she has made and how much it has affected my way of thinking. Because of this book, specifically the section on friendship and how important it is to just "be present" and "make the effort," I ended up doing something that I would never have done, had she not spelled out the importance of showing others how much you care. This was a big deal to me and not something I want to talk about in a brief paragraph, so look for the explanation in a coming post :) Bottom line: I highly recommend this book if you are looking to make some change in your life.

Gymnastics

When I was in middle school, I became obsessed with a famous gymnast, Dominique Moceanu. I had this biography of her childhood and being part of the "Magnificent Seven" in the 1996 Olympics and it was filled with pictures and fun facts. It was a relatively short book, as she was only fourteen during the Olympics and it was a book written for young adults. I never forgot her over the years and in college I started looking up videos of her performing on YouTube. I think I spent hours pouring over various videos from the Olympics and other events. A couple months ago, when coverage of the upcoming Olympics was starting, I started looking up videos of her again. I found a very recent interview with her, talking about an autobiography that she had written called Off Balance. In it, she tells very personal stories about her childhood and all of her behind-the-scenes training for the Olympics, as well as how she felt during everything. And the biggest shocker: that she had another sister, a secret sister, that her parents had given up for adoption because she was born without legs and was never told about. It really is an incredible story and if you are a lover of gymnastics like myself, I would recommend reading this book.

 

Quarter Century Crisis

I love everything about birthdays.

I love giving gifts (even though I stress out over finding the perfect one), attending parties, singing Happy Birthday, watching the candles blow out, celebrating that another person I love has been in my life for another year.

June is my favorite month. It's my mom's birthday, my sister's birthday, one of my oldest and dearest friend's birthday, Father's Day, the anniversary of when I first laid eyes on my husband, the beginning of summer...and of course, my birthday. I have always loved June 5. I love the month, I love the day, I love that I share a birthday weekend with my mom and that my sister's day is right around the corner. I truly do feel special on my birthday, no matter where I am, because I have an amazing and loving extended family and every year we all call each other on our birthdays, and I look forward to those calls every year (and in the last 8 years, the Facebook posts!) Last year I got to do something really cool on my birthday and celebrate the coming birth of my honorary nephew at a good friend's baby shower. I love birthdays.

So why am I not excited about this one?

25 is a slightly notable birthday. I can rent a car without hassle. So that's cool. And it's a quarter of a century! That's pretty neat! But I spent last night tossing and turning, wondering why I was not excited for my birthday this year. As I write this blog post, I still can't really put my finger on it.

Maybe it is because I'm starting a new quarter of life and it is going to be drastically different than the first quarter. (Which is silly, because it's not like there's a guarantee I'm living until 100! I can't possibly know what year of my life is the first of a new quarter!) Years 0-24 were all about growing, changing, figuring out who I am, a real big giant focus on me. Years 25-50 are going to be very different and maybe I'm just worried about messing them up. I have a lot of regrets in my first 25 years and I don't want that for me this time around and I'm scared that I won't be strong enough to make the changes that I really want to make. It's a good thing I have a life partner this time around :)

On my birthday tomorrow, I plan to do a couple new things I have been putting off for months and months because of fear, but I plan to make my 25th birthday the start of some new changes. I also promise to wake up tomorrow with a smile on my face as I start, what I consider to be, a new phase of my life's journey. Because if I'm not trying to move forward, then I am just swimming in place. And that is incredibly exhausting. And as Walt Disney said, "If nothing changed, there'd be no butterflies."

High Five for May 4

It was definitely easy to find 5 great things about this week!

1.) In a spur of the moment decision, I bought these cowboy boots! I was in Philly with a friend and she was actually looking for a pair of cowboy boots and I went inside with her, not interested. The second I saw these boots, I knew they had to be mine, even though this is totally not my style. They called to me and I had to have them. And now I do! I am now totally ready for Oklahoma (should we end up back there!)

2.) I bought this cute little book! I am actually reading the book this is based on, The Happiness Project, and this book is like a little side project, if someone wants to start their own Happiness Project. It is a 5 year journal, but there is only enough room for a few short sentences. It is the perfect amount of space to describe what I did that day, and see the difference in the days over the years. There one page per day, with 5 sets of paragraphs, so that I can see what I did on that day over the years. I think everyone should have one!

3.) My husband sent me a beautiful bouquet of flowers this week. He is in Spain right now, so it was very nice to receive these. Even though they are no substitute for the man, himself. They sure do smell nice :)

4.) My friend Jess, an aspiring photographer, asked me if she could take pictures at my wedding and I said OF COURSE!! She gave me the disk of all the pictures the other day and they are beautiful. Here is an example of her work. If anyone is interested in a photographer to capture those special moments, let me know and I will give you her contact info!

5.) I'm in CT for the weekend and I went out to dinner tonight with my sister and my parents to this AMAZING All-You-Can-Eat sushi restaurant. The food was amazing, and for only about $20 per person, it was totally worth it. I absolutely love sushi!

Hope you all had a great week, as well!